Courtship | Recovering Grace

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When the Courtship Crashes

2 May 2013, 06:00

Lindsey B

“Lindsey? Do you miss them?” The swing creaked as I pushed a blonde boy who attended our church.We came from different families, backgrounds, and were far apart in age, but today I’d been drawn to play with him by one thing in common. Our friends were gone. “Yeah.” “Did you tell them not to come [...]

A Life Defined By Externals

15 April 2013, 06:00

Administrator

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My story is an interesting one. Until I found Recovering Grace I did not know there were many others like me. When I was eight years old my mom and biological father divorced. Even as a child I understood why their divorce was necessary. People say I was born an adult. Within a year my mom re-married a [...]

Commitments, Vows, and Promises of Greatness: The Art of the Spiritual Con

25 March 2013, 06:00

Eliza

…The above memory (albeit a bit foggy with the years) is a typical example of how Mr. Gothard spoke to apprenticeship students at various IBLP and ATI (Institute in Basic Life Principles and Advanced Training Institute) functions I attended. One of the effects of this type of spiritual manipulation was that I began to have unrealistic [...]

Dear Mr. Gothard: One Student’s Letter

24 January 2013, 06:00

Administrator

Dear Mr. Gothard, I’m a former ATI student. I’m writing to you to explain why I no longer support IBLP/ATI, and why I’m involved with sites like Recovering Grace. You invited us to approach you “if” we have been offended. (You used wording, by the way, that you taught us we couldn’t use if we really wanted [...]

Dear Grace: Overbearing Parents

10 January 2013, 06:00

Administrator

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Dear Grace, I am 26 years old with a good head on my shoulders, and am currently in a courtship with a 29-year-old man who has a solid career, is in church leadership, and loves the Lord and me. I’ve always been obedient to my parents and done whatever they’ve told me in the area [...]

The Promise of a Thousand Anecdotes

7 January 2013, 06:00

Administrator

Objects in anecdotes may be less glorious than they appear.

A recurring question in the comments sections of Recovering Grace and for former ATI (Advanced Training Institute) students who share their stories elsewhere, is how and why loving parents would stay in such a program. Two explanations have been explored on this site, and I’d like to posit and explore a third. The first explanation: [...]

Can God Speak Past the Umbrella?

29 October 2012, 06:00

Administrator

“For there is one God and one mediator between God and men, the man Jesus Christ” (I Tim. 2:5). That’s a verse that many of us learned early in our lives. It’s a special verse that assures us we don’t need someone other than Jesus to be our go-between with the Father. He is our [...]

The Raising of a Christian Narcissist

17 September 2012, 06:00

Administrator

My family joined the Advanced Training Institute (ATI) in the early ’90s, shortly after attending a Basic Seminar, at the invitation of a family which has in recent history become a household name. I was in my early elementary years at the time. I didn’t really understand why we were making so many abrupt changes [...]

Here’s The Courtship; Where’s The Love?

25 July 2012, 06:00

Administrator

When I was twelve, my parents came home and said, “Just so you know, you’re never going to be allowed to date.” This was fine by me; I was more into books than socializing. In fact, although I had a speech prepared on why I didn’t date, I never did get to use it. Still [...]

What Have You Done with My Daughter?

14 July 2012, 06:00

Administrator

My first experience with anything Bill Gothard was the Eternal Vision program. My then 18-year-old daughter, who had for years rejected God, had been amazingly touched by God in a Denny’s parking lot. This girl was beaming with joy, sleepless from excitement, and so new and fresh. I urged her to visit some people we [...]