I was lying in a hospital bed recovering from an emergency D&C. I had given birth to a beautiful baby that morning in a free-standing birth center with a midwife. After he was born, things had gotten complicated. His placenta had grown into the muscle wall of my uterus and wouldn’t detach. So, after some heavy bleeding, I found myself taking a ride in an ambulance and facing a D&C or a hysterectomy to save my life. When all was said and done, the D&C had been sufficient and I was recovering with my uterus intact.
But as I lay there, I prayed a prayer that would probably seem strange to most people. I wasn’t praying for a quick recovery. I lay there in my hospital bed and asked the Lord if I had caused this complication.
You see, 22 years before, I had attended my first Basic Seminar. There I had heard that if you fear something, you set in motion some sort of cosmic force that works to cause your fear to come to pass. This “principle” is based on Job’s confession that the thing he had feared came upon him. (See Job 3:25)
During the weeks leading up to my son’s birth, I had been dealing with fear of labor. I had specifically feared bleeding to death.
So, as I lay in that hospital bed, I was thinking that my fear may have caused this rather rare complication.
And I asked Him if that’s what had happened.
A verse in the Bible instantly came to my mind. I still take that as His answer. The verse that was echoing in my heart was, “I sought the Lord and He heard me and delivered me from all of my fears.” (Psalm 34:4).
I cannot even describe the freedom that came to me as I realized that for 20 years I had been believing a lie. God delivers His children from their fears, not to their fears.
Now, I realize how crazy this concept was. It’s nothing more than superstition under the guise of being “Biblical.” How silly to teach the children of God that they have nothing to fear but fear itself. Scripture says we have nothing to fear other than God Himself.
And then to think I had lived in bondage to that fear for over 20 years. I only wish I could go back and claim my new-found freedom earlier. But we know that’s impossible. Instead, I get to rejoice in the two gifts God gave me that hot Texas summer day… a beautiful son and the realization that my God is a good God. He walks with me when I fear and frees me from my fears; He doesn’t turn me over to them.
For a child is born to us, a son is given to us. The government will rest on his shoulders. And he will be called: Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. ~ Isaiah 9:6
13 Comments