Dear Recovering Grace Readers,

April is National Sexual Assault Awareness month. Current statistics show that one out of every four girls, and one out of every six boys are sexually abused (usually by someone they know) before they turn 18 years old. The problem of sexual abuse is systemic, and unfortunately it’s not just out there in “the world.” These statistics are the same across the board, even in “good” Christian homes.  Because this is such a relevant issue, we at Recovering Grace have decided to focus this month on stories of hidden sexual abuse within ATI (Advanced Training Institute) families.

Within the world of Christian fundamentalism, this abuse often went unnoticed because of the attitudes and beliefs that place much of the blame on the victim. The person who was abused was often shamed into silence and they were told (or it was insinuated) that they were the cause of their own abuse. If only they had not dressed a certain way, or been provocative by wearing attractive clothing, or shown some leg or collar bone, they would not have been abused. If only they had followed certain “principles,” their life would have turned out much happier for them. In many cases, those who were abused were denied counseling treatment or help, so that details of the abuse would not be released. This was a form of defending and shielding the abuser to protect the “Christian witness” (a.k.a. the reputation) of a family, church, or organization. Or in the spirit of keeping families together, the wife was often encouraged (or pressured) not to turn her husband in for physically abusing their children.

Many of the stories in our Sexual Abuse Awareness series will illustrate how this fundamentalist system created a perfect storm of abuse-breeding circumstances, including:

• The sexual repression of both fathers and children. There was often no “safe place” for fathers to confess their struggles and find help. Older children were often kept in sexual ignorance and some turned to “experimentation” because they had hormones they didn’t know how to deal with.
• A system which encouraged isolation from the world. Because “the family” was elevated to such a high level, many fathers discouraged their wife and children from having friendships outside the home. Because of this family isolation, children had no one whom they trusted or could speak with about the abuse, even if they had the courage to try.
• Authoritarian structures in which the father was to be protected at all cost for the sake of the family–even in abusive situations.
• An emphasis on keeping up external appearances. It was taboo for any family member to speak out or risk giving a bad reputation to the family.
• Faulty interpretation of Scripture that blamed victims in causing/allowing abuse to happen.

For many young adults writing these stories, this is the first time they have put pen to paper in sharing what they have gone through. It’s a terrifying prospect, often doubly so because of the threats they endured for years to try to ensure their silence. But the first step to healing is acknowledging abuse and bringing to light the things hidden in darkness. They need to know they are not alone, and that many are facing the same battle that they are. And because many have been abused within Christian homes, it can be difficult to understand the healing and grace that can be found in Jesus Christ—the name under which they were abused.

We do want to be very clear on one point: As far as we know, Bill Gothard has never verbally endorsed sexual abuse. But many of the “perfect” children you saw each year at Knoxville, Big Sandy, or Sacramento lived through hell at home. No, Gothard didn’t create the abusers. But he gave them an authoritarian system in which to hide by using “God’s principles” (such as the father’s unquestioning umbrella of authority, and a system of appeals that would break down when appealing to an abuser) as a cover for evil.

This will not be an easy series to read. It hasn’t been easy for us to put together, but we feel strongly that we are called to help people find freedom and recovery through God’s grace. For this to happen, the truth must be told. This is the first step.

“And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” (John 8:32)

~The RG Leadership Team